What We Need To Know When A Relationship Break-Up

Relationship breakups can ruin your personal life, and are devastating for most people. Most people want to find someone they can spend their lives with, someone who will always be there for you, then losing it is one of the worst  thing  that can happen in your life.

After the breakups, the death of a relationship is very much like the death of someone. But unlike the death of a person once it is gone it is gone, a death of a relationship can still be taken back.

Relationship breakups do not have to be forever in many cases. What you have to know and understand is the various kinds of relationship breakups that exists and what you can do about them.

This article is going to give you a brief look into the kinds of relationship breakups and what strategies you will need to undertake to fix them. Not all relationships can be repaired, and not all of them should be, but most of them can. You just need to know the right techniques for each kind of breakup.

The Abusive Relationship Breakups

Breaking up with an abusive relationship is the best solution.No one deserve to be abused. What more if the relationship is permanent. There is a chance that you may be considering returning to someone who physically or mentally abused you, but you need to stick with this kind of breakup. No one should take being abused.

The Mutual Consent Breakup

Sometimes, both people in the relationship may want out and the relationship ends by mutual consent. Now, if this is truly a mutual breakup, nothing you can do to repair the relationship. On the other hand, if it was just called a relationship and was really one of the next two kinds of relationship breakups, that is a different matter entirely.

They Started The Break Up with You

This is usually the most hurtful kind of break up. If this has happened to you, what you need to do first is figure out exactly why the relationship ended. Once you know this, you have to decide what went wrong is this something you could or should fix. If it is something you can and should fix, then this needs to be your starting point.

You Start The Break Up

Sometimes, we break up with a person and then realize we are thrown away something good. When this happens, the first thing you need to do is re-establish trust. This means that you are going to essentially start the relationship over. Start slow, with coffee dates or something similar, and then work your way slowly towards repairing the relationship.

No matter which of the relationship breakups you have experienced, you need to be aware that help is out there. You just need to find the right kind of advice and instruction to allow you to mend feeling and repair your relationship with your ex.

Be Thoughtful Wherever Possible

As Alan Cohen author of "The Dragon Doesn't Live Here Anymore" says "The people who are successful are those who are grateful for everything they have."

A simple and powerful tool that a person will remember is by giving a positive feedback to another person. It is more than giving a compliments.

Be conscious what is going on your surrounding. Begin to notice what people are doing. Do not assume that people know they are being appreciated. If you see someone being helpful or doing a good job acknowledge and show that it is being appreciated.You can never overdue acknowledgment as long as you are sincere,it is given as a gift and it comes from the heart.

Giving is a form for sharing and receiving acknowledgment and it enhance and deepen the amount of trust and respect in a relationship.

Acknowledgment does not expect nothing in return.

Ways To Introduce Yourself

There are proper ways that everyone should observe when  introducing yourself in a social situation. One should be CLEAR,CONCISE, and PERSONABLE to generate interest.

First impression as we all know is the lasting one. Although you may get the chance to alter the first impression, make sure your introductions is strong and positive. It only takes seven to ten seconds to introduce yourself something you have the opportunity to do many times in your life.

The greatest assets one can do is to self-introduction that develops into relationship and rapport while generating interest. When someone asks you "what do you do." do not just say "I am an Accountant" or "I am a Solicitor." These responses only shows who you are, not what you do. The important information you provide to people is what you are doing, what service you offer- something in you  that, you are good at what you do.

Your introduction will either turn off people, leave them cold, or be accepted. Take time to think and develop ways to improve your self-introduction. Here are some guidelines  -

Clear- Be precise on what you do. You want people to be anxious but do not let them be confused.
Concise-Keep it short and simple. Develop "the seven to ten seconds rule" an introduction that says what you want to say in a short sentences.
Distinctive- distinguish yourself  from everyone else while also being professional. You can do this by telling people about what you love to do or other things you are passionate about.
Use simple words - by using common words rather than technical terms you can easily establish and develop relationship.
Engaging - Eye contact, mannerisms, tone of  voice can all contribute how people will perceive you. They will tend to remember your warmth smile, natural reaction, interest and sincerity.

Practice different approaches until you are confident of the words best represent you while getting your message across. Once you have identify the words and phrases, you can adjust your introduction to suit your situation. Practice in front of the  mirror if possible until it becomes natural.At the same time, make it interesting, and generates positive, lasting effect.

How To Generate Conversation in a Group of People

'Too often we lose an opportunity to meet someone because we spend previous time trying to think of the perfect opening line' By Susan RoAne 'How to Work a Room'

In an event, it may not be natural for a person to formally introduce oneself by providing your name and telling what you do. However, you can approach a person by a simple question that serves as an opening statement. Then once the conversation is flowing you can start by introducing yourself and what you do at the right time.

It will be a great asset once you learn  the skill of establishing a conversation and rapport. Conversation generators are icebreakers to which a person can actively response. Anyone that can comment, that are made either as a statement or a question, can provide opportunity for others to start a conversation. Whether the conversation goes beyond the comment or not is irrelevant. What matters is that the opportunity for everyone to interact.

It usually relates to a person to whom you have the same thing in common. You will always have something in common in anyone person in the crowd anyway.

Here are some of the conversation you can start with:
' Can you help .... I am looking for .... 
' I didn't realize we have such a big crowd'
' Hello, welcome to the .........'
' What a beautiful venue'
' How did you get involved with ........ Club?
' I hear the guest speaker is an expert in this field'

Conversation with someone in the crowd is like offering your hand, easy to respond to, simple, and straightforward. You do not want to be seem as preaching, teaching, or putting  the person on the spot. You want a person to put at ease.

The best way to handle the situation and feel confident when meeting people are preparation and practice. You need to make a plan so that you are comfortable approaching people. Do some practice with the people whom you know and with your friends or in a situations where you feel comfortable and you will soon  realize that it will just come spontaneous in your part. As meeting with people becomes more natural and much more easier to handle.

Once you gain this social skill, you will feel comfortable with the group of people that will enhance your enjoyment and effectiveness in social and business situations. You will develop greater confidence in your ability to meet people, generate conversation, and  you will discover new opportunities.

Can You Remember The Person That Was Introduced To You Before

It is both proper and courteous to reintroduce yourself to someone you have already met before. A  person will be glad and appreciative if  you reintroduce yourself because it relieves one of the awkwardness of trying to remember who you are. Do not try to make other person guess or try to make one remember your name. Above all, do not say, ' Do you remember me?' You must give support and empower others while putting them at ease.

When you try to reintroduce yourself, if possible, mention where you met the person and how you come to know him. This will help him remember and establish rapport.

For instance - ' My name is ...... and I believe I met you at ....... '

'It's been awhile, but I remember I met you ......My name is .... etc'
Do not make it as if the other person should remember. Simply reintroduced yourself and use this opportunity to further your relationship. By reintroducing yourself,  you will feel  connected to the person and it is likely that she will remember you from now on. You will also avoid any common discomfort to the other person and your previous meeting can be regarded as the ground  to further your relationship.

A person might be glad to be recognized, but do not pretend to be knowing the person,  if you are not. Have this opportunity to build a good relationship with the other person that you previously know and relate to him appropriately.

"It is always a big person who walks up to you and offers his/her hand and say hello"by David J. schwartz, The Magic if Thinking Big.

Be Gracious And Courteous With Everyone You Meet

"Life is not so short but that there is always time enough for courtesy. " by Ralph Waldo Emerson -Letters and Social Arms.

 Our hectic lifestyles sometimes cause us to overlook common courtesy and good manners. In any relationship it is important to make sure that the use od courtesy and good manners is a priority. There are many ways to be courteous:

* Be aware of the opportunity to hold a door or lift for someone
* When you are seated while being introduced to someone, rise and offer your hand in greeting
* Assist others with their coats
* Unlock and open your passenger's car door before your own
* Ask how you can assist your host or hostess
* RSVP promptly to invitations
* Send a thank you note after you attend an event.

 You never know if someone you meet is going to be important in your life. Treat everyone with respect and courtesy so that people will enjoy and appreciate to be around you. Being pleasant and cordial adds personal power and warmth to the person around you.

See the Magic of Making Up

Steps In Saving Relationship

Jim works long hours and Lesly does not  feel he is there for her. Lesly spends all of her time meeting the children’s needs and Jim feels that she does not  have time for his needs? Can this relationship be saved? Should it be saved?

Here is how to save a relationship.
First, you must decide whether the relationship is worth saving. While almost every relationship can be saved with hard work, both parties must decide that they want to make it work. Because if a partner has opted out and does not want to opt back in, there is little that can be done.
Many people stay in a relationship because it is convenient or remain in a marriage because of the children. But that is not enough. How to save a relationship starts with a commitment by both parties that the relationship is worth saving.
Next, you must identify  the problem or problems in a relationship. One of the biggest problems in how to save a relationship is that people believe the symptoms of the problem are the problem itself.
For instance, many people think an affair is a problem that causes break ups. In truth, the affair is a symptom of a deeper problem. For instance, a lack of true intimacy can lead to a straying spouse. While most people look at the affair as the problem, the underlying cause of the affair was the lack of intimacy in the primary relationship.
If you do not deal with the lack of intimacy, you might be able to keep another affair from starting through the use of guilt, but another problem (for instance pornography) could pop up because you have not dealt with the main issue.
When you start to deal with main issues rather than symptoms, you can save the relationship.
Once you have identified the problems, you can begin to share your thoughts. This means both verbalizing your own feelings and listening to your partner’s concerns. Hold your partner’s hand had when you are talking about your problems as a signal that you want to reconnect even when your emotions are swirling. When your partner talks about things that hurt you remember that he or she is not doing it because he or she wants to hurt you. Rather it is because they want to improve the relationship.
Once you have detailed the problems in your relationship, create an action plan to solve them. Then, take concrete steps on your action plan. If you donot spend time together like you used to, plan a date night every week. Take turns coming up with creative ways to spend an evening together each Wednesday. If not communicating is the problem, commit to spending 20 minutes before going to bed just talking to one another. And, then do it.
Finally, you should realize that saving a relationship is an ongoing process. You are going to take two steps forward only to take one step back. There is going to be both laughter and tears going forward. Be quick to apologize and slow to blame.
Is your relationship worth saving? If so, I’ve described in this article how to save a relationship.

Getting Over Someone You Love

If you want to know how to get over someone you love, you must realize that none of the answers are easy. No matter how ready you might think you are, to get over that person, it is still  going to be a painful process.  Sometimes it is a slow process, too.  You might think you're relationship are over and a year or two you will be reminded of that person again and you might feel all the pain and sadness again.  That does not  mean you are not over to that person, though.

If you had a lot of emotional invested into a relationship and it ends, it is something that can make you feel sad for years.  Maybe even for the rest of your life.  But that does not mean the sadness has to be paralyzing you or has to throw you into a depression. By getting over the person, you  realize that losing someone made you sad, and looking back on it as you would to anyone you loss in your life.  It is the period of time soon after the loss is  the hardest, you might ask yourself  how to get over the loss of someone you love.

If the break-up occurred, often the only way to deal with it,  is just to face reality and deal with the situation.  It is  going to be painful, no matter what you do.  But there are some things you can do to lessen the pain.  You can remove obvious visual reminders of the person, if possible, think of his ugly side.  Photographs of them can be put away for a while.  Gifts they gave you can be stored instead of displayed.  Avoid the places you used to go together for a while.  This tip can be found in pretty much every list that explains how to get over someone you love, so it is  at least a popular idea that is worth a try.

If you are having trouble facing the truth  after the break-up, it might be necessary to seek counseling.  Simply explain that you are just been through a painful break-up and ask the counselor how to get over someone you love.  They can offer helpful advice, and can be more specific that generic lists about how to get over someone you love.  A counselor can also probably offer better advice than friends or family.

Your friends and family might feel they know your situation too well.  Some may have motives to help you get over the person.  They might not liked that you were in that relationship to begin with, so they might want you to get over things or move on to another person too quickly.  With a counselor, though, you can safely tell them things about the relationship you probably do not want friends or family to even know.

Feel free to go to counseling for as long as you need to.  If the counselor feels you are spending too much time dwelling on how to get over your love, they will tell you.

If My Ex Wants Space How To Get Him Back

How To Get Him back If He Wants More Space

We all  have experienced a powerful relationship in our life, but suddenly , everything which seems so perfect is broken off because your boyfriend wants space.

There are a number of reasons  why he may suddenly need space -

* it maybe because of family problems
* insecurities, or
* a fear of commitment

Here  are some suggested reasons why your ex boyfriend needs more space.

- You are not going to want to lose your pride, or to allow him to get the best of you - but clearly you are still in love with him. It may be ideal to play a little bit hard to get at first.

- If you are feeling like your ex boyfriend still has feelings for you, then it may be ideal for you to start a conversation with him. Keep communication to a minimum in order to keep the level of drama to a minimum. Short text messages, brief phone calls and online conversations are a great way to remind him how much he wants to be a part of your life without overwhelming him with your presence.

- Eventually he will begin to show meaningful interest with you again if all goes well, and this will give you the chance to truly begin to reminisce with him. Keep in mind that you should focus primarily on all of the good memories associated with your relationship in the past. While rejuvenating a relationship with your ex boyfriend. Stay away from the bad experiences and negative experiences.

- If your boyfriend is not responding to your approach, you need to take it for what it is. Either he just really is not interested in you right now, or he really does just need space and you should give it to him. But if on the other hand he seems to be interested in you more than before, or is slowly warming up to you again, then you should continue gradually  to rekindle the relationship.

- If your ex boyfriend is giving you the right signals, you can try to open your heart up to him. Let him know how you feel, but avoid looking desperate or needy in the process. If your ex is showing interest and  that he is thinking about rekindling things, then it would be healthy to be open with him.

These are just the beginning steps in winning your Ex back. They are the initial steps I followed when I lost the love of my life. And frankly these are not my original ideas. I turned to T 'Dub' Jackson when I had no idea of how to get my true love back.

T 'Dub' authored a simple, down to earth step by step plan called "The Magic Of Making Up". And you know, it worked like magic.